I take one tentative step, and then the next. It gets slightly easier; with every step I take.
Bit by bit, I inch slowly forward; on a path that I was told; would lead to pastures new.
My mind is foggy; slow and sluggish… thoughts take an age to form; and fade away in a blink.
My mind tries to rally; it tries to fight back… but I chained it too tight; I must not let it think.
I must clear my thoughts; and occupy my mind. I try to count my steps; and keep a steady breath.
Warning lights are on; everywhere in my head… everything hurts; if it’s not already numb.
My heart pains me; a dull, throbbing ache… perhaps I am healing, or will it never end?
I blink in the light; every ray a stab of pain. Has it truly been so long? Am I so used to the dark?
All throughout, I hear a metallic rattle; as my brain strains to free… itself from its chains.
I shift my gaze downwards, and place one foot forward… I must not lose this fight; it must not break loose.
But despite all my tricks; I fear that it’s no use; my mind has won its freedom; and it turns its ire on me.
It taunts and torments me; with question after question… not one of which I seem; to have the answers for.
Where are we going?
Where have we been?
Is this the right way?
Should we turn back now?
Are we moving too fast?
Or are we too slow?
Why is everyone
so far ahead already?
What’s in our future?
Why are we so alone?
What have we done wrong?
Is it too late to change?
What do we seek?
And how do we do so?
How do we ever know
If we walk the right path?
Step by slow step; I inch closer still… to a future unknowable; a land I’ve never been.
All the while I’m pelted; with the constant panicked cries… of a mind that never learned; the art of letting go.
I place one foot forward; and take one more step… all the while ignoring; my deafening doubts and fears.
They rise to a keening wail; but one that I never hear… as I raise my head up high, and sing a cheerful tune.
