"How do I live without the ones I love? Time still turns the pages of the book it's burned".
Without fail, every single time I've listened to Avenged Sevenfold's "So Far Away", I was reduced to helpless tears... because it really asks a fundamentally unanswerable question; how does one survive without those they've come to love and depend on for companionship and emotional support? How can someone be expected to continue functioning after being dealt what feels like nothing less than a mortal stab to the heart? How does one cope with a loss so overwhelmingly agonizing that it's all they can do to stave off suicidal thoughts when all they crave is endless, dreamless sleep- and a permanent end to their suffering?
The thing about this song is that it's one of those songs everyone can relate to... because who among us hasn't tasted the bitter taste of a painful goodbye? Whether it be a family member, a close friend, a former mentor or a lover, every one of us has been through it, and every one of us has suffered. The pain of losing a load-bearing pillar of support; the core -or even sole- component of one's entire support system is enough to reduce anyone to a numb, emotionless existence as they struggle to adapt to life without something that only had only recently been as crucial to their survival as air or water.
And "loss" doesn't necessarily mean death.
When you love someone, you wish for them to always be happy- or failing that, then simply alive... and yet, in case of a painful breakup with the love of one's life, their happiness without you somehow always has unwelcome implications; because the unavoidable fact is that if they're happy without you, then you have stopped mattering to them... or that you at least you matter a lot less. "Losing" them then becomes doubly painful; because while they're -thankfully- still alive and well, you've not only lost them as lovers, but you're also faced with the cruel fact that life always moves on. Whether it be a week, a month, a year or even a decade later, eventually they will move on. They will forget how they felt with you, as the faults in your character become more and more glaringly obvious to them, the more time passes by... and in due time, someone else will make their heart race.
Someone else will keep them up at night.
They will give "that" look -the look that used to be all yours; the look that used to make your day- to someone else.
They will be vulnerable with someone else.
They will be intimate -both sexually and emotionally- with someone else.
They will marry someone else.
When they watch a cheesy romcom, someone else will pop into their mind.
And when they eventually start comparing you to their current significant other, you'll inevitably come up short- as all the things they used to hate about you stand out in stark contrast to the polished excellence of their new partner. That comparison maybe unfair; as their new partner was able to reach certain milestones you weren't allowed to; and even in the aspects you both managed to reach, you may have matched or even exceeded them back in your day... but the inexorable march of time will eventually dull your shine. They will eventually forget all about you, and their new partner will become their unchallenged and undisputed confidante, life partner, lover and sex symbol.
Or worse still; they won't compare them to you at all, because... you've guessed it; you've stopped mattering to them altogether.
A million million questions batter your mind, like raindrops spattering against a window; what if they moved on? What if they grew to love someone else more than me? What if I've ceased to have the same effect I used to have on them? What would they think if we coincidentally met somewhere? Do they still think about me? How long would it take them to date someone else, and to be physically intimate with them?
A million million questions, and absolutely no answers.
All you can do at this point is survive. It's not about "living" or "enjoying your life" or "being happy" anymore... your day to day achievement becomes merely not dying. And your reward if you manage to weather this storm? Existing as an emotionally dead hollow shell, incapable of love or emotion.
So, how do I live without the ones I love, you ask?
You don't. You die if you're lucky, and survive if you're not.
Without fail, every single time I've listened to Avenged Sevenfold's "So Far Away", I was reduced to helpless tears... because it really asks a fundamentally unanswerable question; how does one survive without those they've come to love and depend on for companionship and emotional support? How can someone be expected to continue functioning after being dealt what feels like nothing less than a mortal stab to the heart? How does one cope with a loss so overwhelmingly agonizing that it's all they can do to stave off suicidal thoughts when all they crave is endless, dreamless sleep- and a permanent end to their suffering?
The thing about this song is that it's one of those songs everyone can relate to... because who among us hasn't tasted the bitter taste of a painful goodbye? Whether it be a family member, a close friend, a former mentor or a lover, every one of us has been through it, and every one of us has suffered. The pain of losing a load-bearing pillar of support; the core -or even sole- component of one's entire support system is enough to reduce anyone to a numb, emotionless existence as they struggle to adapt to life without something that only had only recently been as crucial to their survival as air or water.
And "loss" doesn't necessarily mean death.
When you love someone, you wish for them to always be happy- or failing that, then simply alive... and yet, in case of a painful breakup with the love of one's life, their happiness without you somehow always has unwelcome implications; because the unavoidable fact is that if they're happy without you, then you have stopped mattering to them... or that you at least you matter a lot less. "Losing" them then becomes doubly painful; because while they're -thankfully- still alive and well, you've not only lost them as lovers, but you're also faced with the cruel fact that life always moves on. Whether it be a week, a month, a year or even a decade later, eventually they will move on. They will forget how they felt with you, as the faults in your character become more and more glaringly obvious to them, the more time passes by... and in due time, someone else will make their heart race.
Someone else will keep them up at night.
They will give "that" look -the look that used to be all yours; the look that used to make your day- to someone else.
They will be vulnerable with someone else.
They will be intimate -both sexually and emotionally- with someone else.
They will marry someone else.
When they watch a cheesy romcom, someone else will pop into their mind.
And when they eventually start comparing you to their current significant other, you'll inevitably come up short- as all the things they used to hate about you stand out in stark contrast to the polished excellence of their new partner. That comparison maybe unfair; as their new partner was able to reach certain milestones you weren't allowed to; and even in the aspects you both managed to reach, you may have matched or even exceeded them back in your day... but the inexorable march of time will eventually dull your shine. They will eventually forget all about you, and their new partner will become their unchallenged and undisputed confidante, life partner, lover and sex symbol.
Or worse still; they won't compare them to you at all, because... you've guessed it; you've stopped mattering to them altogether.
A million million questions batter your mind, like raindrops spattering against a window; what if they moved on? What if they grew to love someone else more than me? What if I've ceased to have the same effect I used to have on them? What would they think if we coincidentally met somewhere? Do they still think about me? How long would it take them to date someone else, and to be physically intimate with them?
A million million questions, and absolutely no answers.
All you can do at this point is survive. It's not about "living" or "enjoying your life" or "being happy" anymore... your day to day achievement becomes merely not dying. And your reward if you manage to weather this storm? Existing as an emotionally dead hollow shell, incapable of love or emotion.
So, how do I live without the ones I love, you ask?
You don't. You die if you're lucky, and survive if you're not.
